POTW Season Finale

So when the dust settles on the 2009 season (which it has) this is what it looked like. A taste of the new (the Fatboys Championship and the Techies missing the playoffs) with a dash of the old (Vipers again fail in the playoffs and the Baconators are in last place).


Fatboys
Down the stretch Coach Fudge outcoached us all. The number of free agent move made by him in the final weeks of the season helped to secure his victory over the Pineapple Express and Tenn. Valley Vipers. The team that was once a doormat of the league is now the #1 team in the league.





Tenn. Valley Vipers
The 2009 Appalachian Conference is the close as Coach Swirl will get to his El Dorado this year. Another year, another playoff run, another disappointing end. The Vipers are not the first team to go through this, and like the teams before them you have to wonder if their window of opportunity has closed.



Pineapple Express
Disappointing could sum of Coach Ov's season as well, but it shouldn't. The Pineapple Express ran away with the PAC 4 title, lead the league in victories-posting a 10 win season to do so. The Pineapple Express struggled last year with on 4 wins and the turn around the team made for the 2009 season should not go unnoticed by anyone. The season will not end with a title, but it will end with a World Cup win and a lot more respect.



Fergs
The Fergs expectations for themselves are high, as high as any team in the league. It is for that reason that Coach Ferg will not be happy with the results of the 2009 team. However, in all fairness this is a team that started out dead last due to a bizarre auto-draft that saw Pat White and 2 kickers be placed on the roster...an awesome start to the season for sure. It took a few weeks to trim the fat from the roster but Coach Ferg showed why he is one of the best coaches in league history. The Fergs rallied to win the Road to Auburn and make a good showing in THE playoffs. Ferg; the draft will be around the end of August/early September. Plan your babies accordingly.





Gusmeisters
If not for the Fergs late season it would have been the Gusmeisters in THE Playoffs. As it stood Coach Gusty's squad was dropped to the NIT, but once there they made a statement by knocking out both opponents and securing the #1 overall pick in the 2010 draft. The Gusmeisters have an excellent draft history and career record so they should be a real threat given the #1 overall pick....not to mention back-to-back picks every other round. Good time to replace that Larry Johnson guy.







Mallards
In 2006 the Mallards made the Super Bowl. I point that out to point out the fact that this was the best Mallards team in the history of their franchise. The team's first round pick never took the field and their TE went out for the season while leading all TEs in points. Add to that LaDanian Tomlinson starting to show signs of age and a WR being suspended of substance abuse and it could have been a nightmare of a season. Despite all of these challenges Coach Murphree held the team together with roster moves that made the team remain competitive all the way to the end. It was a ship that was taking on water for most of the season, but he kept it afloat all the way to the last week which is a noteworthy performance.



Frat-tastics
In the past two years the Frat-tastics have quietly snuck in among the top teams in the league. A Championship Game appearance last year and only missing THE Playoffs by 1 game this year shows that Coach Askew has real potential to field a Championship level team. If not for QB Matt Ryan's injury he may have made that championship run this year.





Turbo Techies
Well this is the first time I have ever written a season finale that didn't start out with the Turbo Techies. The Techies 2009 campaign was in many was stranger than their first two seasons that resulted in Championships. In 2009 the Turbo Techies lead the entire league in scoring and were within reach of the record for most points scored for an entire season. Despite this massive scoring the team still struggled to win week in and week out and only snuck into the NIT on the last day of the regular season. Add to that a blowout once they were in the NIT and it will go down a year that looked a lot better than it actually was, or was a lot better than it looked. Such is the enigma that is the 2009 Turbo Techies.

Steel Dragons
Perhaps Randy Moss is showing his age with more and more inconsistent performances or perhaps that is just the Randy Moss we always knew. Regardless of the case the Steel Dragons, much like their WR, were up and down most of the season...mostly down. QB Philip Rivers and RB Maurice Jones-Drew gave Coach Plousis two of the best players at their respective positions but the lack of consistent role players doomed this once fierce reptile team into another Christmas spent at home instead of playing in any playoff scenario.

Raging Girth of Fury
Despite some criticism from fellow coaches around the league Coach Hand's first tour of duty could have gone much worse. Playing in his first fantasy league, and in a league where the other teams have years of experience on him, you could have expected this team to go winless. It would turn out that not only was the team not winless but they finished ahead of many established teams. The Ragin' Girth of Fury is only learning how to make a few free agent moves away from being a top 8 team.

Bama Black Bears
Holy shit where to start. If you just read my "feel good-moral victory" post on the Ragin' Girth of Fury then your going to love this. The 2009 Bama Black Bears have officially become a verb. If you were going to use it in a sentence it would sound like this, "Don't fuck up and pull a 2009 Bama Black Bears."

Decepticons
At times last year the Decepticons looked like a good team that caught a lot of bad break. In 2009 they looked more like a bad team that just broke a lot. The Decepticons had moments and even some big scores in 2009, but they never strung enough of them together to turn the season into a playoff level performance. The good news? Coach CT is only in his second season and he was able to beat a couple of teams that are seasoned veterans.

da Bears
Eventually POTW will stop picking da Bears to win it all with every pre-season poll...and that is the year they may do it. da Bears were in there annual pre-season "picked to win it all" contender spot and again this year they were unable to perform up to those expectations. The team is not without talent in spots, and Coach Doyle has shown he can field a winner, but this version of da Bears appears broken. The start players such as Andre Johnson and Stephen Jackson do not get any significant, or consistent, support from the rest of the roster.



Baconators
If consistency is important to you then it was a great season. The Baconators finished last in 2008 and repeated the performance in 2009. I'm not sure if they are the first team to accomplish this feat but they are certainly the most recent. The bright spot on Coach Al's roster was QB Peyton Manning, followed by backup QB Ben Roethlesberger...no, you can't start 2 QBs but if you could the Baconators probably would have won more games this year. The star of the WR corp for years has been T.O. but he is starting to show his age and it could be him for Coach Al to overhaul this last place crew.

POTW PRO BOWL TEAM:
QB-Drew Brees Turbo Techies
RB-Chris Johnson Fatboys
RB-Maurice Jones-Drew Steel Dragons
WR-Wes Welker Bama Black Bears
WR-Andre Johnson da Bears
WR-Percy Harvin Mallards
TE-Dallas Clark Pineapple Express

ANTI-PRO BOWL TEAM:
Just as important as the Pro Bowl is the team that is made up of first round players, or better yet keepers, that helped to destroy their team's season

QB-Jay Cutler Bama Black Bears: high point total but high INT total
RB-Larry Johnson Gusmeisters/Turbo Techies: Called his coach a faggot on twitter, was suspended twice in one season, and was finally cut by his NFL team in the middle of the season...POTW should name an award after him
RB-Marshawn Lynch da Bears: he started the season off suspended. He ended it just barley in top 50 fantasy points for all RBs. Top 50. For a keeper.
WR-Roy Williams Bama Black Bears: At this point we should all stop over paying for this guy. Just because the Cowboys are overpaying him doesn't mean you have to.
WR-T.J. Howsyourmadden Decepticons: He started off the year bitching about how low his character was rated in Madden NFL 2010 (seriously, I couldn't make that shit up). He backed up his big talk by spending most of the season as a complete non-factor, indicating that the guys who program the Madden games may know more than T.J. about T.J.'s ability

AWARDS:
Rookie of the Year: Percy Harvin-Mallards
Best Free Agent Move: Coach Askew/Frat-tastics: RB Jamaal Charles
Most Points Scored (Team): Turbo Techies

Well that about does it for the 2009 season guys. Thank you to everyone for making this another great year, this league wouldn't exist without the time and support you all put into it. Enjoy the next few months of not having to worry about which 10 point RB you should start or who is playing the Browns/Lions/Rams/Raiders this week.

See you in August...

POTW Championship Edition

For starters you should look up in the right hand corner and notice, that the Techie flag has been ripped down from it's resting spot of 2 years. You should also note that I pissed off my editor (again) and the spell check is on strike. It would appear we had a creative disagreement regarding his [Blogspots] stupid formatting. Suck for you since I'm too lazy to proof my own work but I think you'll get the idea.

----VS---- Fatboys 159----------------------Tenn. Valley Vipers 109 THIS LITTLE PIGGIE WON A CHAMPIONSHIP

Truth be told I shouldn't have to write this. In truth the only story to this game is told by the score. The Vipers posted their 2nd worst performance of the year in their biggest game of the year. The Fatboys won with the Browns defense and a Browns RB. Seriously. If you think that I'm going to praise the Cleveland Browns in a POTW your dead wrong. Let's just say good job Coach Burton and the Fatboys for not only winning but not even allowing it to be close.

P.S.
Hey, I found that logo in the trash and it makes for as good a header as anything for this game













----VS----
Pineapple Express 8--------------------Fergs 5
GOAL!

The Game of the Year. Perhaps no game generates more talk each year than the Futbal World Cup. I can't remember a Super Bowl in our league that was even remotly close but the World Cup never dissapoints. The 2009 version was no exception. Despite the Fergs having the obvious advantage in a kicker named Stephen Gostkowski, who just sounds like a futbal player, the Pineapple Express were able to take home the win with an American kid named Billy. A kid named Billy winning the Futbal Championship, Socceer has officially arrived in this country.

UPDATE: turns out that Gostkowski kid is also American. Not only is he American he is from Mississippi. Oh well, for the purpose of this article he is from Eastern Europe.





----VS----
Gusmeisters 164-----------------------Mallards 131
GUSMEISTERS ARE ON THE CLOCK

"And with the #1 overall selection of the 2010 draft the Gusmeisters select...." While we have to wait until late August to find out how that statement ends we know that it will be Coach Gusty making the call. The Gusmeisters just missed THE playoffs but made the most of their time in the NIT not only winning but looking strong in their wins. The Mallards put up a good fight but they just did not have the weapons that the Gusmeisters did and in the end fall to the middle of the draft as oppose to the head of the line.

See you in a few days for the Season Finale...

Playoffs: Round 1

Every great league has a playoff system* and the Alabama League is no different. Time to see who gets their name on the cup!



*even the SEC....we can't help it if the rest of college football can't keep up with the level of our top teams

The Show:

----VS----
Pineapple Express 113------------------Fatboys 155

PIGS DEVOUR PINEAPPLES

Crap, now I have that Shinedown song stuck in my head...oh well, I'll try and push through it. Hard not to look at the Pineapple Express in a state of some disbelief. Sure the Fatboys won the game more than the Express lost it as Coach Fudge's team scored all over the board; but did we really expect Tom Brady and the Vikings defense to play so bad in one week? We expect big things from Tom Brady due to the simple fact he is named "Tom Brady". The Vikings, one of the better units in recent years, were playing the Panthers, lead at one time by Jake Delhomme and now by some guy named Moore*. So I can but the Pineapple Express' QB and DEF down for a combined 50 points at least right? Wrong. The Patriots continued to look like a very average team and the Vikings...well, I'm not sure what the hell happened there but Brad Childress was mad about it, Brett Farve was mad about it, and I'm sure Coach Overton was pretty pissed about it as well.


*first name unknown to POTW, the NFL, and most of the Panthers locker room




----VS----
Tenn. Valley Vipers 174-----------------Fergs 134
VIPERS STRIKE FERGS

A classic matchup of old teams finally in a game that mattered and featured more than just kickers playing in it. The Fergs jumped out to an early lead with the first few games and the Vipers looked like they would be headed to the showers early. But some things are just meant to be and in the second half the Vipers showed why this could be their year as everything from the QB to the defense, and yes, even a rare sighting of the Vipers running game, produced big points to send the Vipers to the Super Bowl for the second time in team history. The Fergs on the other hand but up a strong effort but Roddy White is just not as productive with the Falcons make-shift (make-shit, whichever) QB situation and in a game that was played on a frozen field in freezing weather the Jets decided that letting rookie QB Mark Sanchez throw the ball all over the place was a much better idea than letting veteran RB Thomas Jones carry the ball...the Jets lost, ironically to the Falcons and their make-shift QB. The score was 10-7. I have to think that in a low scoring game in the middle of the winter in New York in the snow someone would say, "Hey maybe our RB, who is the leading rusher in the league over the last few years, should see the ball a few times." I guess I would be wrong to think that.

The NIT:
----VS----

Gusmeisters 136-----------------------Frat-tastics 107
QB WOES CONTINUE FOR 'TASTICS


The loss of Matt Ryan continued to haunt Coach Askew and the Frat-tastics as former Auburn, soon-to-be former Redskins, and still current fantasy journey man QB Jason Campbell took the field. Campbell, along with fellow fantasy longshots Justin Forsett, Danny Amdendola, Jaamal Charles, and Antonio Bryant were unable to take down the Gusmeisters. In all fairness to these guys, Amendola and Jaamal* produced big points, while the Packers normally fierce defense was shreded to pieces. Coach Askew apparently understands the importance of the QB and has already re-signed Matt Ryan.

*while POTW is prone to many spelling and grammar errors Jamal actually does spell his name "Jaamal". Bryan "with a 'y'" and Jaamal "with 2 'a's"





----VS----
Mallards 140-------------------------Turbo Techies 103
MALLARDS POUND TECHIES...AGAIN


For the second time this season the Turbo Techies were torn to pieces by the Mallards. The techies were all over the map for most of season and this game was no different. Joshua Cribbs running not 1 but 2 100 yard kick returns for TDs was more than enough to but the final dagger in the Techies. The Mallards would add to Cribbs day with a big performance from Joe Flacco (i.e. Keau Reeves/Joe Falco). It appeared that the Mallards were trying to run up the score a bit and not only win but make the Techies the blowout of the week for the second straight time in their meetings with the green heads.

See you after we crown a new champion...oh yeah, Merry Christmas

Playoff Preview

This is why you read those fantasy mags, monitor roster changes, and care what the fuck Jason Campbell or Ryan Fitzpatrick did this past weekend. This is THE Playoffs. A chance at history, at least as history can be told by your name etched forever on the Championship Trophy.



----VS----

Pineapple Express-------------------------Fatboys


Two new money teams work to become first time champions in their first every Playoff appearance. 2008 was horrible for Coach Overton but that all changed this season. The Pineapple Express have rolled over everyone this year as the easily won the PAC 4 and posted the best W-L record in the league...they rolled over almost everyone I should say. The last time these two played it was the Fatboys that not only won but posterized the Express as the Blowout of the Week. The Fatboys have struggled at times this season but have turned it on towards the end winning 6 of their last 8 games and scoring over 130 points in almost everyone of those games.




----VS----
Tenn. Valley Vipers-------------------------Fergs


If the Pineapple Express/Fatboys is a new money game then this is a classic matchup of old world powers. The Fergs and Vipers have the best win/loss record in the history of the league and are 1st and 2nd in career playoff appearances. 2009 will mark the 4th consecutive year these two franchies have met in THE playoffs. The two teams that invented the "Futbal World Cup" because they were so disgusted that they would not make the Super Bowl will meet with a ticket to the Championship game on the line.




...but wait there's more! Once a forgotten ugly step-child that served no real purpose (like Back to the Future 3 was to the Back to the Future franchise) here comes the NIT! The NIT now means a lot as the winner is rewarded with the #1 overall draft pick in the next year's draft...ok, so it isn't your named etched in glory but it is a nice prize in it's own right.


----VS----
Gusmeisters------------------------------Frat-tastics

The Frat-tastics were close to making another late Super Bowl run this year when it all ended on the final week of the season. While another trip to the Super Bowl will not happen this year the Frat-tastics are one of the higher scoring teams in the league and have an excellent shot at winning the NIT. The Gusmeisters are in many ways a mirror image of the Frat-tastics. Like the 'Tastics they lost their shot at a wildcard on the last game of the regular season and they have also quietly been a high scoring team. The Gusmeisters look not only to advance to the NIT Championship but also to avenge their week 10 loss to the Frat-tastics.



----VS----
Mallards-------------------------------------Turbo Techies

We are treated to one of the more entertaining re-matches in this game between 2 of the best (scoring) teams in the league. If this were the BSc Playoffs you would still see these two teams meet up as they were #1 and #4 in overall scoring much of the season. Expect all or nothing from this game as the Mallards have had the Blowout of the Week on more opponents than any other team this year....but they also can come out looking very flat. The Turbo Techies play that same game, Drew Brees and the Techies Saints can put up 6 TDs a game....or throw 4 INTs and no TDs.

See you after, Round 1...FIGHT!...

Week 14

Last week of the regular season, and last week in general for many of you. Since it is already Wednesday, and apparently this is the 2nd most anticipated POTW of the year based on how many of you are asking about it, I will post a playoff preview POTW for this Friday. But first let us give credit where credit is due:

Congrats Fergs, 2009 Road to Auburn Conference Champs





----VS----
#1 Pineapple Express 135--------------#4 Gusmesiters 126
EXPRESS DERAIL GUSMEISTERS

With the wildcard in their possession all the Gusmeisters had to do was beat the Pineapple Express in order to setup a rematch against this very same team in the first round of the playoffs. The Pineapple Express apparently like variety as they ended the Gusmeisters season officially during the Monday Night game. The Cardinals defense did not play too poorly seeing as how they allowed 5 points while the Cardinals offense turned the ball over 7 times. It is pretty unfair to a defense to put them in that situation all game long and expect them to post big numbers.
<---Cardinals offense; pull handle and ball pops out

----VS----
Baconators 119---------------------Turbo Techies 157
DEATH FOR BACONATORS

Grudge match if ever there was one. And there was one. The two skull logo teams have fitting logos as they are the best at shit talking and seem to love nothing more than beating each other. In a week filled with verbal taunts back and forth it appeared that the Turbo Techies and Baconators would be playing for the next-to-last draft pick as they would secure the worst record in the league. Fate is a fickle mistress. The Turbo Techies not only won the game but due to the stars aligning in the other games they will make the NIT and get to play for the #1 overall draft pick. I can hear the collective groan from all of you.

Like it or not you have to admit. The Turbo Techies are pretty hard to kill off.

----VS----
#3 Tenn. Valley Vipers 153-------------#5 Frat-tastics 122
SLAM!

With the Gusmeisters going down the Frat-tastics took over the wildcard spot and needed only a win against the sporadic Vipers in order to secure their own spot in THE playoffs. The Frat-tastics took an early lead and Vipers RB Rashard Mendenhall did very little so it appeared the Frat-tastics would be on their way back to play for a second straight Super Bowl appearance. Then the Vipers air attack took flight and slammed another wildcard door shut once and for all. Coach Askew can only sit and wonder what the season would have gone like had QB Matt Ryan stayed healthy.

----VS----
#7 Mallards 111------------------------Decepticons 67
THANKS FOR PLAYING

The Decepticons season is over. Make that was over. With an anemic 67 point showing it appears that Coach CT's team was done playing after week 13, although some of you would argue they never really started this season. Perhaps the Decepticons should have taken Coach Wes' advice and changed their name to the Cobras so they could have experienced the same down-in-flames fate as the GI Joe movie.






----VS----
da Bears 118-------------------------#2 Fergs 140
HIBERNATION COMES EARLY

It is that time of year again. Playoff time. Time for the Fergs to start winning every week and for da Bears to disappear. Good thing da Bears have Andre Johnson, because without him I have no idea what kind of jersey's da Bears would sell in their pro shop. Johnson posted 42 points in his final game of the season which is more than every player (including the defense) on da Bears combined (with the expection of QB McNabb). You read that right, Andre Johnson beat just about the entire da Bears roster all by himself.

----VS----
#6 Fatboys 154-----------------------#8 Steel Dragons 120
OINK OINK!

So it seems every other review I am telling you a sad story about how a team had the wildcard spot and lost it. Then there was the little pigs who could. The Fatboys. While the Steel Dragons needed a win to secure their NIT spot the Fatboys needed the win to make THE playoffs, a win they were able to achieve in dramatic fashion. The Steel Dragons were again transformed into the Tin Lizards as Randy Moss decided he did not want to play in the NIT or play at all in week 14 for that matter. He posted a memorable .6 points in Coach Plousis' last battle in the 2009 campaign. While Coach Plousis was unavailable for comment I'm sure it was something like this, "Fuck that guy."


----VS----
Ragin' Girth of Fury 109.65----------------Bama Black Bears 109.15
NIGHTMARE COMES TO A CLOSE FOR BEARS

So in every review I told you a tale of how a team had a wildcard spot and lost it. The tale of the 2009 Bama Black Bears will go down in memory as one of these tales. Heading into the month of November the Bama Black Bears were the favorite for the wildcard and in the top 5 in total points scored. The team had been inconsistent but most felt they would pull it together down the stretch. They pulled it together down the stretch about as well as Barbaro did, with the same result I may ad. The Bama Black Bears drowned in the last month losing their last 4 games and not only missing out on the wildcard but on the NIT all together. There are train wrecks and then there is the 2009 Bama Black Bears season.
For Coach Comer and the rest of the Bama Black Bears, this, is how it would end...




See you, Friday for the 2009 Playoff Preview...