Week 11

Oh my! Time is running out and it looks like this could be one of the better playoff races in history. With zero teams being eliminated and only 3 weeks to go expect this one to end like the a race at Talladega...complete with "the big one" which will leave many teams crashed and burning. As Rev. Ray Lewis would say, "It's go time!"




----VS----
#1 Pineapple Express 121-----------Turbo Techies 105
TECHIES DROP RECORD 5TH STRAIGHT

The Turbo Techies set a record that they would rather not have. With their 5th straight loss they set a record for the worst losing streak in club history. All of this on a week in which they talked about playing the role of upset against the Pineapple Express and calling the Pineapple Express the "luckiest team in the league". The beautiful irony here is that Coach Wes used some logic in making that argument; stating that the Express had only played 2 teams that have scored over 110 points. The Pineapple Express have still only played two teams that scored over 110 points.







----VS----
Baconators 119--------------------Steel Dragons 107
BACONATORS SCORE 2ND WIN IN A ROW

So maybe early in the season the Baconators were the source of a lot of material for POTW and for some other teams. Not so fast my friend. While still not likely to make THE playoffs the Baconators have quietly put together a good run, oddly enough, since losing RB Bryan Westbrook. The Steel Dragons on the other hand are headed in the opposite direction as with their 2nd straight loss the Appalachian Conference is now out of reach and they can only look forward to a wildcard or more likely trying to get a spot in the NIT playoffs*.

*calling it the "NIT Playoffs" conveys the appropriate message and is much shorter than writing out "The playoffs for teams that didn't make THE playoffs but still get to play for the 1st overall draft pick in 2010." So NIT Playoffs will now refer to what I just said.





----VS----
#2 Tenn. Valley Vipers 134--------------- #8 Fatboys 133
FATBOYS OUT-COACH THEMSELVES IN CLOSE DEFEAT

100% of the time nothing works 100% of the time; 60% of the time it works everytime. If you understand this concept you can begin to see why the Fatboys loss this week*. Coach Fudge started the Lions defense due to their matchup against the Cleveland Browns because, let's face it, the Browns are a complete train wreck and have score less than 10 offensive TDs this season...so start your defense against them. Problem; that math does not work when you factor in the fact YOUR defense against them will be the Detroit Lions. The Lions managed to pull out -9 points against the Brady Quinn lead Browns.
Fans in Detroit know what to expect from the Lions. You should too.

*if you understand this and your an Asian you can teach Economics at the University of Alabama





----VS----
#7 Gusmeisters 143--------------------#5 Mallards 124
DUCKS FALL TO GUSMEISTERS

Only getting beat by 18 points and still being the Toyota Blowout of the Week doesn't seem fair but that shows just how close all the games were this week. If you in the Mallards camp an 18 point loss is especially frustrating as you have to think TE Owen Daniels and WR Dwyane Bowe or Anthony Gonzalez would have come in handy in this kinda game.







----VS----
da Bears 152-----------------------#3 Frat-tastics 159
REPEAT OF 2009?

The Frat-tastics have shot up to #1 in the Road to Auburn conference and look to be in good position to make a run at the playoffs again this year. The Frat-tastics spent the first half of the season struggling to find wins but have turned it on the 2nd half of the season, just like they did last year when they took that late momentum all the way to the Super Bowl. Sadly da Bears most recent loss eliminates them from any shot at winning the Appalachian Conference but they could still rally to find a spot in the NIT.





----VS----
Decepticons 108---------------#4 Bama Black Bears 101
DECEPTICONS OUT PILLOW FIGHT THE WATER BEARS

"I'd like to have that one back." While not a direct quote from coach Comer it was probably something close to what he said...ok honestly he probably said something like "fuck" but you get the idea. Sitting on the coveted #4/wildcard spot the the Bama Black Bears had only to beat the 108 point scoring Decepticons, had their RB played they may have been able to do it. If Turner was out of the game then surely WR Roy Williams (yes the same douche bag who nicknamed himself "the Legend") pulled a legendary performance and played 4 quarters without catching a single pass. The best part? Yahoo does not even consider that news worth as they has no breaking news. It is as if yahoo saw him score zero points in a game and said, "Fuck that guy, I'm really just not that surprised he couldn't catch a pass." If the Bama Black Bears miss THE playoffs by 1 game expect coach Comer to beat Roy Williams with a hose
Roy Williams is just as shocked as you by his lack of ability




----VS----
Ragin' Girth of Fury 119---------#6 Fergs 132
FERGS SURVIVE BYE WEEK

Coach Ferg actually did say something to that effect in his Smack Talk. I understand the feeling. The RGoF is the rookie team in the league and has struggled (a lot) at times but many of you (of us) can't laugh because they still managed to beat us. Playing the RFoF is kinda like playing Boise State. You really don't take them seriously and you have everything to lose with nothing much to gain. The Fergs did however gain their way to the wildcard spot with this win.

Happy Thanksgiving

See you after week 12...

Week 10

Why did it take so long to get POTW out? Good question with a better answer. I deleted it. Thanks to a mistake on my part POTW was ready for press when I forgot to save it. So I worked just hard enough to pick up the broken pieces and duct tape them back together so I could get this out before I had to title it POTW Week 11.

The Jihad Bowl

----VS----
#7 Fatboys 113----------------------Baconators 145

The Fatboys came into this game having never beaten the Baconators. They kept that streak alive as Coach Al broken out the Monopoly pieces and the DR Field and Brush Mower. With the win the Baconators climb into a tie for last and the Fatboys go back to being a .500 football team.

The Theta Bowl

----VS----
#1 Pineapple Express 165--------------#5 Fergs 156

I'm not going to say much about Coach Wes' remarks about how the Pineapple Express has only played 2 teams that scored over 110 pts and I'm not going to remark about Coach Ov saying they are playing to their competition. Both remarks are true and in the end the only stat that matters is a W or an L (ok, so I did comment on it). The game against the Fergs was very close and could have been better had the Pineapple Express RB Ray Rice gotten to play the Cleveland Browns, who at this point look like they would not be competitive in the NFL Europe*.

* I know this league does not exist so feel free to sub in WNBA or the United Football League

Tennessee River Shootout

----VS----
#4 Mallards 116-----------------------#2 Tenn. Valley Vipers 122

You could make the argument that neither team really deserved to win and you'd be right...of course you would also have to immediately discount any team that ever wins when they don't score 100 points and any team that scores under 110 (since Wes seems to have made that a golden standard). In the end one of these teams was bound to win and with the Mallards QB playing the Browns on Monday Night Football you had to think it would be the ducks...sorry, that still bothers me. Can anyone tell me why the fuck the Cleveland Browns were even on Monday Night Football? Seriously. What did we do to deserve that? If we can get the Browns why can't we get the Lions vs. Rams, Redskins vs. Chiefs, or Raiders vs. Oakland High School for our next few Monday Night games.

The Peach Bowl

----VS---
Ragin' Girth of Fury 92-----------------Steel Dragons 159

Well that didn't take long. The Battle for Atlanta/Woodstock GA was over before it began is some ways. The Steel Dragons took little time in thrashing their cross street rivals as Coach Hand celebrated turning 30. Probably a good thing he wasn't watching this game or it would have aged him much faster.

Lawyer Bowl

----VS----
da Bears 104--------------------------#6 Bama Black Bears 118

A great battle between two lawyer head coaches, two bear named teams, two teams that POTW always picks to finish high in the standings, and two teams that have not found anything that even resembles consistency this year. While both teams are still very much alive they look like Tennessee (minus the massive arrests), as they can dominate one week, lose or win a great close game another week, and then get blown out by a bad team yet another week. In this game they were both able to shine and so what they do best; have a player score 30 pts. while another player scores negative points. The bright spot for the eventual winner Bama Black Bears is that in week 10 QB Jay Cutler had as many fantasy points (5) as his threw interceptions in week 9. Congrats to Cutler, really looks like he has that thing headed in the right direction.

Birmingham.MIS.com Bowl

----VS----
#8 Turbo Techies 129-------------Decepticons 147

My how the worm has turned for the once mighty Techies. Reduced to a war or words with the Decepticons in a humiliating loss and still ranked dead last in the PAC 4 conference. The impressive point total for the Techies has not translated into wins and the verbal smack down from CT was enough to have the Techie fans headed for the exits early in this game. Time to get that trophy down out of the closet, perhaps pretend to clean it up, and get ready to send it to a new home for 2010.

Magic City Classic

----VS----

Frat-tastics 125-------------------#3 Gusmeisters 104

With a chance to take a firm grasp on the Road to Auburn Conference the Gusmeisters ran out on the field and promptly shit the bed. In an even more ironic twist the Gusmeisters, who came into this game ranked #3 in the land, would fall to #7 after the loss and the Frat-tastics would climb all the way to #3 in the league and #1 in the Road to Auburn Conference. Much like Larry Langford being mayor of Birmingham the Gusmeisters will want to pretend this never happened.

See you after week 11...

Week 8

Welcome to November...and I must say October went out with a bang as we celebrated Hallow Havoc on Saturday. Details not forthcoming.
PLUS! Great news. My editor [Spell Check] has ended his holdout and is back at work. However, sadly my photographer [Clip Art] was grumpy this week and needs to get off his ass next week.



----VS----
#2 Pineapple Express 113------------#8 Ragin' Girth of Fury 107
DESPITE STRONG EFFORT FURY RUN OUT OF STEAM

Coach Jim could be a strong team going forward as in week 8 we saw some good roster moves (i.e. benching players on a bye week). Despite this the Pineapple Express, minus Brady, was still able to keep up their winning ways and slip past the Fury. The game came down to the last few plays as Larry Fitzgerald missed a pass in the end zone as time expired for the Cardinals as well as the Ragin' Girth of Fury. Ironically the Fury were hampered by one of their best weapons, Ronnie Brown. It would appear the Wildcat is not so wild when facing a good defense because the New York Jets held the former Auburn star to only 4 points on the day.







----VS----
#4 Turbo Techies 104--------------#7 Mallards 162
TECHIES/TROJANS FALL TO THE DUCKS

"I'm like the USC of the PAC 4 conference". This was a bold statement made by Coach Wes at the start of the season. Shortly after the Oregon Ducks were done pounding the USC Trojans into the swamp the Mallards took the field against the Turbo Techies and proceeded to send them to join their USC counterparts. It was the first time the Mallards have beaten the Techies and they made it memorable. The Techies receiving corp never got in gear as Brandon Marshall, Greg Olsen and Johnny Know both posted under 10 points. If this was not exciting enough the Jaguars defense looked like USC against Vince Young...fitting since they played against Vince Young.
Mallards fans rejoice at the defeat of the evil Techies

----VS----

#1 Tenn. Valley Vipers 141----------#6 Bama Black Bears 124

BEARS SINK IN THIRD STRAIGHT GAME

The Bay Bears are doing all they can to keep their heads above water as they posted their 3rd loss in a row this past week. Wes Welker's absence was not what the struggling Bama Bears needed as more points from WR Roy (the self proclaimed) "The Legend" Williams posted only 9 points. In the end though this loss was not about a single bad performance, or even a bad over all performance. The Bama Black Bears posted decent points but just came up short by games end. Despite the bad run of luck Coach Comer still has the water bears at .500 and in very real contention for the wildcard if not the PAC 4 title.

----VS----

#3 Gusmeisters 126-------------------Fatboys 135

SIGN OF LIFE FROM THE FATBOYS

The Fatboys, long since considered dead from the start of October on, rose up and posted a nice win against the #3 team in the country. Perhaps the best aspect of the game was the arena football quality it had. Besides the high score what quality would I be referring to? The fact that both teams would have scored better if they would not started a defense. The Faboys/Broncos defense posted -3 points only to be outdone by the Gusmeisters/Cardinals defense posting -4 points. All of this made much better by the fact that Coach Gusty had the Cowboys defense (23 points) on the bench this week.

This just in...Ted Ginn has returned ANOTHER kick for a TD against the Gusmeisters.

----VS----

Baconators 134--------------------- Decepticons 78

BACONATORS POUR TABASCO SAUCE IN DECEPTIONS ASS

Feel that burn! The Decepticons posted their 3rd loss in a row in dramatic fashion as they were run out of the building by the Baconators, who now are tied for last in the Road to Auburn conference. For the Decepticons it was more of the same; crappy players playing like crap. WR Kenny Britt (probably no relation to any of the Britt's from Bama...unless he can flip a pool table) posted 1.7 points while Willis McGahee topped that inept showing with a 1.3 game. My favorite stat is not that Willis posted 1.3 points but that he did it like this:

Rush Yards: -1
Receptions: 1

Rec. Yards: 4

Power stats for sure. The only question now is which fantasy team is going to be unfortunate to draft him next year...on the off chance the Decepticons don't keep him.

"What you talkin' about Willis!?" Talking about getting his ass kicked it would appear.

Note: the dirt is still going forward although his body is most certainly not







----VS----

da Bears 146-----------------------Steel Dragons 103

BEARS PROVE TO BE THE TOUGHER BEAST

Dragons and Bears squared off against each other this past weekend and it was the fur covered animal taking down the metallic reptile. Injuries and bye weeks hampered the Steel Dragons as TE Chris Cooley was unable to play (and won't for some time) while WR Randy Moss was on a bye week. The gaps in the roster left by those two were filled by Marcedes Lewis and Nate Washington...a slight step down in talent. Lewis did actually catch a pass and Nate caught a TD which had to please Coach Plousis but in the end the two replacement players only combined for 13 points.







----VS-----

Frat-tastics 111--------------------#5 Fergs 99

NOVEMBER FEELS LIKE SEPTEMBER FOR FERGS

Perhaps Coach Ferg said it best, "There is the Fergs I remember from September." Indeed with the start of November the Fergs reverted back to their pre-season form as they lost to the Frat-tastics and failed to break 100 points. You know your day is going to suck pretty hard when your kicker outscores 5 of your other players, as happened to the Fergs this past week. I really have no lack of directions to go with regard to this game but I'll start and end with Steve Slaton. Slaton fumbled twice and was benched against the Bills only to have his backup, Ryan Moats, come in and post 32 fantasy points...ouch for the Fergs. Playing against the Bills rush defense should have been a treat for Slaton, but sadly for the Fergs Slaton dropped his treat and Ryan Moats ate it. Slaton would finish the day with 1 point.

<---RIGHT CLICK TO SET AS WALLPAPER
No real point to this picture being here other than she is a Texans cheerleader and this article dealt with Texans players. Besides, every other site (including ESPN) has used this exact picture in an attempt to talk about the Texans. POTW is just going to skip the BS talk about the Texans part and post the picture for you.

BSc Standings
1 Tenn. Valley Vipers
2 Mallards
3 Turbo Techies
4 Pineapple Express
5 Fergs
6 Gusmeisters
7 Ragin' Girth of Fury
8 Frat-tastics

Coach Poll
1 Tenn. Valley Vipers (4)
2 Pineapple Express (1)
3 Mallards
4 Turbo Techies
5 Fergs
6 Gusmeisters
7 da Bears
8 Bama Black Bears

See you after week 9...unless I play for Florida and assault somebody, in which case I'll see you by halftime of week 9